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I have a long-time friend back east who LOVES Christmas!! Al the wonderful sensual phenomena: the smell of the cookies and pastries she bakes, the colorful presents of all shapes and sizes, the fresh evergreen tree and multi-colored lights, and ornaments of all the colors of the rainbow.

But last Christmas she got a severe case of the flu. And it seemed to stay with her for weeks. As Christmas approached she found herself getting sadder and sadder,
- missing her routine of baking – its smells, the texture of the flour and butter, and sugar, and nuts,
- joy of buying special presents and wrapping them in beautiful paper and bows;
- the music at concerts and parties,
- the wonder of experiencing God’s eternal forgiveness at her parish Advent Reconciliation Service
- the myriad of holiday sweaters and jewelry that adorned her friends/colleagues

She summed up how she felt by saying to me: “My illness stole my Xmas from me!” –
– and thought about not driving the 5 hrs. home for Xmas because she was still so easily tired and had nothing to take home with her.

Last evening, I called her on Xmas day and got merely an answering machine. So, I called her family home to see if by any chance she had changed her mind and driven home.

Well, guess who picked up the phone? (You got it!) – and she greeted me with a jovial “Merry Christmas” greeting! I said to her, “You sound wonderful. I am so glad you drove home for Xmas. What changed your mind?”

“Well,” she explained, “I spoke with my mother several days ago and I told her how I felt physically, and that I had no presents, none of the baked goods that everyone likes… and she cut me off (as she always does!) – and said in a low soft voice (rarely heard from her mother) – ‘Honey, just your being here is more than enough.’”

“And so, she said, “I hung up the phone and started to think of all the people who had helped me the past several weeks during my illness, the meals friends brought to my apartment, work colleagues doing some of my work at the office so I would not be too far behind when I returned, the people that took me to the doctor’s office, the phone calls from people like you who care for me, and I felt renewed again.. still sick, but renewed.”

“So, here I am ..and it’s wonderful… and I didn’t do a thing!”

And good theologian that any of us can be, my friend added, “I found out again what Christmas and our entire faith is about – the essence of it all is WHO not WHAT.”

And that is precisely why we celebrate today. God become flesh, not just an idea, not just a series of rituals and words, but the Divine become human. And as faithful Xians we in turn become Christ to one another, making the Incarnation happen again and again.

The reign of Good, about which Jesus speaks over and over again in the Scriptures is simply yet most challengingly, people living in harmony, caring for one another, committing themselves to find the presence of the Divine, the image of God in each an every person.

The reign of God is about WHO, not WHAT.

The other day (Fr.) Brian and I were talking about the difference between Santa Claus and Jesus – the “god” of popular and commercial Christmas (stripped of his roots in our Christian Saint Nicholas) and the God in whom we Christians celebrate today.

We celebrate a God who so passionately loves us, a God who so delights in us, that we are given his Son as a reminder of a God who forever loves us and forgives our sin and shortcoming, no matter the failure; a God who sent his Son to remind us of our innate beauty and goodness that no shortcoming can ever destroy.

Santa, on the other hand, gives us material presents according to his list, checking it twice for thoroughness, according to how “naughty or nice” we have been.

So I’d like to suggest something for us during this Christmas season.

First, to take some time to reflect on and give thanks for the goodness of those with whom you are celebrating the holidays. Things you admire, gestures you have appreciated, even quirks in their personality that make you grin or smile. And if you find yourself wandering of into “But if s/he would only do it more…” – stop yourself and just focus on the goodness and give thanks… breaking the tendency to judge and condemn, even for that moment – just to remember that no failure can destroy their innate beauty and their goodness in WHO they are.

Second – the challenge. Do the same reflection for those who may not be at your Christmas celebration this year – the ill or dying among the family and friends you know; the “black sheep”, the one struggling with addiction; the unemployed; the soldier away at war… And again, keep focusing on just their goodness as you did first with those it may seem easier to think about and give thanks… remembering what we celebrate today:

God delights in us, even more than my friend delights in the sounds, and sights, and tastes of Christmas.