Happy Mother’s Day to everyone.  This is a day when we can all celebrate as we honor those who have been mothers to us in our lives and remember the differences that they make in our world.  We honor our own mothers, our grandmothers, stepmothers, great grandmothers, Godmothers, and all those who mother us and have mothered us along our journey.

Fathers honor their wives. Children honor their moms and their grandmothers, and we especially honor single moms who do it all on their own.  My mom was a single mom; she raised six of us by herself.  Between the oldest and the youngest are only seven years.  So, what mom did, she made us a team.  The three oldest learned to take care of the three youngest.  And as I was preparing for this wonderful privilege, my youngest brother, who I always still think I take care of, called and said, “Good luck.  Go for it.  And, I’ll be thinking of you.” 

My one sibling sister lives here. The others all live in the South.  So, even though we don’t see each other, we talk to each other often, weekly. We don’t text, but we talk to each other often and we have always learned how to care for one another—through the gift of my mom.

She taught us to listen and make a difference, and have a relationship with God.  We celebrate those who care for the young in motherly roles:  foster moms, day care workers, teachers, coaches, etc.  Our Gospel today speaks of love, peace and learning to trust in God.  Jesus asks us not to allow our hearts to become troubled or afraid.  Jesus reassures his disciples that He will always be with us.  He gives them and us instructions on how to love each other, work at being peace-filled followers, and have faith that He will always be with us.

Mothers play a unique role in living out this Gospel message.  We, like Jesus, are constantly looking for ways to teach our children how to love, how to walk in peace and justice, and maintain our strong faith.  We strive to help our children understand that we will love them unconditionally and we will always be with them.  And, we teach them how to make their own difference in the world.  But often mothers are faced with challenges that make living this Gospel message very difficult.  We try to love our children, even when they hurt and disappoint us.  We try to bring peace to our families, even when it’s dinnertime and everybody has low blood sugar and is cranky and has many chores to do before the next day. We need to remain to be peace-filled people. 

And, we try to remain central in their lives as our children go off to college, work, pursue their own dreams, get married, and have kids of their own.  At one point my mom had a series of strokes and the six of us got together and we really struggled with what would be the best thing for mom.  I decided that the best thing would be for her to come and live with us.  Well, I had five other siblings I had to convince that I wasn’t too busy to take care of our mom.  Mom could no longer talk and really it was the beginning of saying goodbye to her.  So, we had about two years to love her in a new way.  We became her mom.  We had to watch her every second. We had to make sure we helped her get dressed. So it was a very different role for all of us—and we were privileged to do this.

Then, this year, I had my own struggles with health and our four daughters and my husband reversed roles on me.  They made the schedule:  who was going to be taking care of me. They made the schedule of who was going to be watching out for me.  So, what goes around comes around and that was not easy for me.

My husband Jim and I have been blessed with four wonderful daughters.  We had all four of them in four years.  We were crazy!  Those early years were so physically demanding and exhausting, we never thought we were ever going to sleep a whole night through, but we did and we do now.  Each year as the new baby entered our family we were reminded how blessed we were.  And then, when they went off to school we learned how to let go a little bit as we watched them experience success and failures on their own.

As we were flying across the country and moving here we had three little ones on the plane with us and I was eight months pregnant with the fourth one.  And as we were flying over Kansas I thought, “Is this where she is going to be born?” because I had started labor.  And my husband turned around and said, “How are you?” and I said, “Fine.  Fine. Fine.  I think we’re going to make it.”  We did make it and our little darling, the fourth daughter, waited until all the furniture was unpacked before she came.  Very thoughtful!

We watched as new people, especially teachers, became important to them.  The teenage years though brought a whole new set of challenges.  We worked hard to maintain a close relationship with our girls but we were often tested in our love and our faith by the pressures and dynamics of adolescence.  Imagine four teenage girls.  Wow!  But we had wonderful people helping us parent.  We had to learn to trust them to make their own decisions and we had to rely on our faith in order to do that. 

Then our daughters each left our home to go to college, then work, then go out into the world and make a difference.  We watched as they fell in love with four amazing son-in-laws.  We had four weddings in four years, (And I’m still standing, I know!) and they started families of their own.  We now have seven grandchildren under the age of four with two more on their way.

Becoming a grandmother has been the most joy-filled experience of my life.  In the role of “Grammy” I am a different kind of mom—one less worried about the rules, the schedules, and the boundaries, and more willing just to shower the precious little ones with all the love that I have to give.  Now I’m in the back seat of the car and I’m not driving anymore.

One thing that constantly strikes me is that being a mother is a life-long job.  Just because our daughters are now mothers themselves does not mean that I spend less time worrying about them, checking on them, loving them, and guiding them—but, I don’t text them!

 The role of mother changes with each new stage but the fundamentals remain the same.  We must learn to love them unconditionally, foster peace in our hearts and our families, and instill in them the gift of faith.  That’s how we make a difference in the world.  Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had.  How many would attest to that?  (And you’re all sitting, that’s great!)  But it is also the most rewarding job.  For eight years I had the privilege of staying home with our four girls. When I returned to teaching, they were in school and I had to learn again how to balance the demands of a career that I loved with the needs of my family. I’m still doing that and it’s 30 years later.

Too often today women put enormous pressure on themselves to be the perfect mom.  There is an influx of advice and information on what is best for our kids but we are the ones who often know the most about what is best for our own kids.  So we have to trust ourselves, use common sense, and trust our faith, even in the most challenging times. 

Each mother is unique in her own style. And each mother has the ability to make a profound difference.  Mine is but one story and every mom here has her own story—the joys, the sorrows, the good days, the hard days, the proud moments and the challenging moments.  We work hard to give them the roots they need and the wings that they need for living life to the fullest.

Today we give thanks for all those who have mothered us.  We celebrate them in the many ways in which they have touched and changed our lives.  And now, as my mother always use to say, “Keep it short.” 

Happy Mother’s Day.